8 Stupid Options for Pickup Trucks
Love 'em or hate 'em, Americans love their pickup trucks. Some need them for work, some just want to have one for pleasure, and others just think they look cool driving one. Whatever your reason for owning one, they're big business in the Land of the Free.
That means they get a lot of attention from auto manufacturers intent on making theirs appear to be a cut above the rest. Options are usually where it's at with new vehicles and trucks are no different. Sometimes, the idea is a good one. Sometimes, it ain't. Here are eight epic failures in truck options recently offered by manufacturers.
Pickups are about the tough guy image. The need to be able to haul heavy stuff and drive through interesting terrain. They're about power and strength. They're the everyday man's version of a big rig on the highway. But good luck finding one that comes in a manual transmission.
For several years, most manufacturers have ceased offering manual transmissions as an option in their pickups. Nearly all full-size trucks are automatic by default - despite the fact that a manual gearshift usually means better gearing ratios for more power in many situations.
#7 Bed Liner Not Standard
Anyone who uses a pickup truck for what it's for knows that having some kind of bed liner (be it the cheap plastic type or spray-on protection) is a must. Most truck owners that don't have a bed liner and use their trucks like real men find out in about three seconds why they should have added this option.
#6 Diesel Only for the Big Boys?
Looking for a more fuel efficient, more powerful diesel option but in a smaller truck? Good luck. You won't find it anytime soon. Mahindra was trying to bring a compact truck here that had a diesel engine under the hood, but the red tape was too thick. Ford has suggested it might try doing it.. some day. So far, nothin' doin'.
#5 Aesthetic and Special Edition Packages
What could possibly say “pretty boy poseur in a truck” more than having a special edition package with interior treatments worthy of a Bentley? Not much. From Platinum editions to Longhorn options, these are everywhere and all of the makers have them. They include plush seating, specialized color schemes, prettied up dashboards, and more. All at the price of a bed camper or useful trailer. Nothing says “I own a truck because I'm a dweeb” more than these special edition options. The only exception might be Ram's Lone Star package, since we all know that if you live in Texas, you have to let the world know it.
#4 Front-view Cameras
Really? What's the point of this narcissistic idea? Are you really thinking you're going to meet up with Toby Keith and happen to have a chance to record his blockbuster ad-hoc performance via your truck's front-facing camera? Do you run into AFV moments often enough that having the ability to record via the comfort of your cab is important enough to have this as an option? Didn't think so.
#3 Interior-view Camera
Speaking of narcissism, what about the interior cam option? What the hell is this for? Are you so full of YouTube moments that you seriously need this kind of driving distraction built into your rig? Is your commentary on farm life so poignant that you need an easy way to record it as you sit in traffic commuting to your desk job from suburbia? Get over yourself.
#2 Food Holder
At first, this strikes me as a good idea. Then the logic kicks in. Eating while driving is not generally a good idea for obvious safety reasons. Yet someone had the great idea that adding this option would make you safer. This despite the fact that it very obviously encourages eating while driving. One manufacturer at least had the good humor to call it the Food Assist Replacement Tray.
#1 Built-in Trucker's Helper
If you've seen the plastic bottles of “apple juice” lying on the side of the road, then you're familiar with the Trucker's Helper. When a driver's gotta go, he's gotta go. Right? Well, pickup drivers aren't any different, according to one company. This is a center console option that.. uhh.. well, serves as a sort of port-a-potty for the desperate. It's made of a space-age polymer that's dishwasher safe. Assuming you are willing to put your potty into the dishwasher with the plates you eat off of. Maybe they figure a real cowboy wouldn't care.
Got horrible options you've seen? Comment!