Skip to main content Jumps on Charlie Sheen Craze with Winning Cars

The folks at have decided to have a little fun and ride the media wave (some would say disaster) that is Charlie Sheen by coming up with a list of The Top 10 Winning Cars for 2011 with the key phrase being winning, which is the former Two-and-a-Half Men star's buzzword.

Keep in mind that Charlie Sheen would probably not find any of these cars winning and, in fact, would not be caught dead driving most of them, even if they ran on tiger blood (except maybe over a cliff). However, with his current career trajectory and his expensive habits, he may soon be parking some of these as a Malibu valet.

The one car Sheen would drive on the winning list would be the Mercedes SLS AMG, the tribute to the gullwing classic of the 1950s. It's a car any man with a drop of testosterone in his body would be thrilled to drive. (Trust me – I've been behind the wheel. It's automotive porn.)

Here's the list of winning cars with some appropriate comments next to them:

  • 2011 Ford Explorer – Is something winning when it's just better than the previous model? Is a sober Charlie Sheen automatically better? The new Explorer is bland.
  • 2011 Chevy Volt – Kind of like an increasing number of Americans feel about Sheen, the Volt is overhyped. Just shut up about it already.
  • 2012 Fiat 500 – Well, the NY Times finds it adorable. Porn stars find Sheen adorable. Nobody can feel safe with either one, though, because of the fear of the inevitable breakdown.
  • 2012 Toyota Corolla – It's the number one selling car of all time. Sheen is on a top-rated comedy show. Maybe that's why the Corolla makes the list.
  • 2011 Chrysler 300 – Kind of unfair to associate this hot new sedan with Sheen. The Chrysler 300 is not a has-been.
  • 2012 Ford Focus – Ford has a Focus. Sheen doesn't. Enough said.
  • 2011 Nissan Leaf – Charlie could be headed to shock therapy. Then again the Leaf is also having production problems. Maybe there is a correlation between Sheen and the Leaf that isn't initially obvious.
  • 2011 Chevy Cruze – Looks better on TV than in person. You decide if I'm talking about the Cruze or Charlie.
  • 2011 Lexus CT 200 h – It's name is as clear as some of Sheen's attempts at poetry.

Curious what kind of car Charlie drives? Apparently he has a thing for Mercedes because he had two stolen from his driveway last year in a span of four months. Both times the keys were in the ignition. Not a very winning move.

Give some credit for finding a way to tie their website into Charlie Sheen without having to suddenly run pictures of his two goddesses. This list of winning cars could be a winning move.

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